Sunday, November 25, 2012

ELECTION 2012 (If It Were ME, I'd ...)

With all the madness finally out of the way and the votes tabulated (yeah ... IIII know: 'that-electoral-college-aint-our-vote-they-miscounted-etc, etc) another Presidential election is finally in the books and all we've gotta do is wait until Jan.20 to seal the deal for another 1462 days.

Hey ... remember back-in-olden-times, when the movers and groovers were talkin' about gettin' one of our own to be Prez someday? (Yeah, I know ... we might've just missed the boat with George W., but did we win out with Obama or what? [now, watch me get busted for sayin' that ... lol])
Well, back then, the buzz was for Morrison or (especially) Zappa to take the plunge! 'Course, they couldn't do it 'cause the law says ya gotta be over 35 (and we didn't trust anyone but record execs over that age, right?).

Well, every four years or so, I get an email (Man, I've just gotta start writing more. Then I'll get more email than that!!) asking what the Rock Relic would do if he were President.
Geez ... let ... me .... think (reflective music as screen gets blurry):

Well, first, the National Anthem would be rendered ala Jimi Hendrix. Nobody could paint a musical picture better than his "Woodstock" version of the tune ...

We'd close up the chapter in Afghanistan and bring our military home -- sending a Tuppperware lady, a Chippendale dancer, Rush Limbaugh and Richard Simmons over to totally confuse the enemy until all troops are withdrawn.

I'd make "idnit" and "dudnit" legal words (examples of usage: "That ol' car's 'bout wore out, idnit?" "Looks silly with that bald guy drivin' it, dudnit?"). Hey -- I'm in Kentucky. I'm entitled ...

I'd pardon older-model cars with bald guys driving them. But not the drivers themselves. Unless they're bald(ing) Relics and have classic rock pumpin' from the speakers ...

People would be promoted heavily. Life would be revived. Time would be extended. All other magazines would have to stand on their own ...

I would commission scientists to study the Rolling Stones to determine the cause of their longevity. By doing so, we may be able to extend life by 120 years ...

(I'd find a use for this space, considering I lost part of my script ...)

There'd be a national ban on "Microsoft Explorer needs to close" messages
 
The national food would be peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches. Toasted. With bananas.

I would ban Maalox®, because, for some reason, there is no FemalOx. And indigestion shouldn't be sexist ....

And I'd ask cuzzin Gary Belich to be my VP ... after all, he's got the cooler record collection ...

Hey, look ... if we can see guys calling themselves None Of The Above ('tis true! Both L. D. Knox and Eric Mutch legally changed their names ) run for public office, and even a cat run for President in 1988 (Nine Lives® cat food's Morris), then it could be possible for me to ... 
(Suuuuuure, Relic ... and it's possible there was a Wizard of Oz ... right??)

Stay tuned ...

Thursday, November 8, 2012

The Election Selection

Okay ... who doesn't know the winner of Tuesday night's election?

Obama? Well, he did keep the job, that's true ... but that's not who I'm talkin' about, Mousers!

Y'see that lady up there? She's an Iraqi war veteran named Tammy Duckworth. Went into the heat of battles as a volunteer (hey ... don't ever forget that our forces are made up of those! They could've stayed home, dug a little music, watched a little TV, hung out at malls, done whatever -- but they chose to put their lives on the line if necessary ... and all for the love of their country! And that's as brave as it gets!).
.
She came back with her legs missing ... and almost losing her right arm! See, she was co-piloting a UH-60 Black Hawk helicopter when it was hit by a rocket propelled grenade fired by Iraqi insurgents (source: Wikipedia).

This lady -- a Lieutenant Colonal in the Illinois National Guard -- could've given up, called it "quits", gone on disability ... gotten her husband to tend to her as a paraplegic ....
but NOOOOOOO!!
Instead, she set her goals higher, determined that this injury wasn't gonna get her down!
And, as of Tuesday night, that brave and lovely soul became known as ...

CONGRESSWOMAN Tammy Duckworth, U.S. Representative from the 8th District in Illinois ...

Y'know, Uncle Lloyd had a lot of faith in humankind ... and, whether in his book (Stuff Happens!) or his TV show (ummm ... I forgot the name of it ...) or just (c'mon, you know I'm kiddin', dontcha?) amongst his friends and fans, he stressed the importance of never giving up ... believing in yourself ... meeting your challenges, overcoming them to reach a success that's rightfully yours!

And Ms. (excuse me: REPRESENTATIVE Duckworth!!) is a prime example of what he was talking about ...

So, IMHO, there's your true winner amongst the elections shaking the political tree a few days ago!
And we can all can learn from this hero's attitude. I mean, sure, there are those who don't like the Prez, are glad Romney lost, or whatever. But, y'know what? To quote Tim Conway: IT DON'T MAAAAATURRR!!!!
What does matter is that she has shown, both in her valiant service on foreign soil and in her determination to climb that ladder to become one of our leaders in Congress, that you can make a difference, whether you are disabled or not! DON'T EVER GIVE UP!! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF AND YOUR CAPABILITIES!
So ... from the MouseKeeper and allllllllllllllll those who tune in to this blog regularly, we say:
GOD BLESS YOU, REP. DUCKWORTH!!  AND THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE AND DEVOTION!!  MAY YOU HAVE A LONG AND SATISFYING STAY IN CONGRESS!!!!

'Nuff said??
Then stay tuned ...

Thursday, November 1, 2012

You Can Run But You Can't WHAT??

C'mon ... you already know the last part of the title, right?? ]
Uh-huh: You Can Run ... But YOU CAN'T HIDE!

When we look around us at the troubles we've faced over the past year alone -- political unrest, militant uprisings and meteorological upheavals -- we see countless opportunities to get involved for the cause of peace.

Whether it's in our country after a terrible hurricane or in our neighbourhoods, which are constantly battered with a deluge of venomous talk, violence or both, we've got the opportunity -- the power -- to do something to make life a bit better.

Recently, Phil "Fang" Volk (formerly with Paul Revere and the Raiders) released a cover of Bob Dylan's The Times They Are A-Changin', and, with a rocking (and haunting) arrangement, has transformed this '60's battlecry into one for today. In a moment, I'll repeat the link where you can pick up your very own copy of this stirring rendition.

But, as I listened to it (overandoverandover again), I couldn't help thinking about how so many of us have heard our local TV stations blaring the news about this country, that leader, or some other faction making a moral misdemeanour into a fierce, foreboding felony. We listen ... shake our heads ... and turn the channel ...

Y'see that pic over there on your right?? Pity, isn't it?? But so many people are like that; it's alright to talk brave or big or whatever when things are going smoothly, but let one thing go wrong and THOOMP! There goes the proverbial "head in the sand" like a scared ostrich. He doesn't want to confront the issues -- he just wants to hide ...

but remember this:

If you stick your head in the sand. DON'T COMPLAIN 'CAUSE YOUR BUTT'S GETTIN' FRIED!!

We, of the musical, "peace-and-love" generation, learned three important things about confrontation: (1) It isn't gonna kill you, (2) you stand to benefit far more than lose and (3) one day, your children and your children's children are gonna thank you for it, because you made the world a better place ...
because you decided to make a stand and not "take to the sand" ...
because you know ...that, just as Lennon said, "it's all up to you, mate."

Now, listen: If we, as a generation past, could bring civil rights, voting rights, women's rights -- and even an end to a vicious war -- by standing strong, what more can THIS generation do, with the technologies WE didn't have?

Mindbending, isn't it??

Yes, the times, they are a-changin'! Now, I told you about that link to "Fang's" inspirational cover of that song. Just click on his page at PhilFangVolk.com and scroll down a bit. Trust me, yardbirds: this song is gonna knock yer socks off!! So get it now!!

It's Lupus Awareness Month

A couple of days ago, whilst I was thumbing through the pages of FaceBook® (okay, so I just scrolled through it on the web. It just sounds fancier this way ...), I was reminded that May is Lupus Awareness Month here in America.

Now, I can tell ya from first-hand experience (having had a partner years ago with the disease, and also having been involved with the National Lupus Foundation™), this is not an affliction to be overlooked or (worse) underrated by anyone.
Simply put, lupus is a disease where the patient's overactive immune system attacks healthy organs via the connecting tissues. It can affect the kidneys, lungs, heart -- in fact, any organ of the body.

The disease -- which can affect internal organs (SLE or systemic lupus erythmatosus), the skin (discoid), or appear due to certain drug reactions (DIL or drug-induced lupus, the only curable form of the disease) -- has hit a number of music's favourite artists.
You see one in the pic to your right. Yep. Michael Jackson.
Then there's the great soul artist, Seal (remember Kiss From A Rose?), Georgeanna Marie Tillman (of the fab girl-group, The Marvelettes), today's super songstress Toni Braxton and more (including a non-singer: former First Lady Barbara Bush and her and George's pet, Millie!).

Decades ago, anyone diagnosed with lupus was practically doomed. But, thanks to the significant strides made in research and treatment, patients can expect to live long, happy and productive lives.

But, in some circles, they're still treated as lepers or castoffs -- and that's where you come in, oh faithful Mousers.
Let's get the word out about the Awareness campaign going on this month. Hey ... the more we know, the better we can confront this (presently) incurable disease, right??
Remember: lupus patients are no different from you or me. They deserve the same rights, understanding and happiness that everyone wants! Get informed about this disease -- and share what you've learned with others, okay?

Believe me, it'll make a BIIIIIG difference, gang!!